Arrived at the local stores to find empty shelves everywhere? Is that YOUR fault? NO! We know whose it is...

1-Ply just like his lies, get your  NOT MY PRESIDENT  bathroom waste retrieval clothes aka toilet paper...

This special feces fibril is sure to wipe all your ejecta away. 

Use it to absorb your tears away while suffering through a "Presidential" press conference.

Spilled coffee, gum on your shoe, smashed a roach?

No problem! Let someone else's President take care of those important jobs.

Give it as a gift to a loved one or friend who adores walking orange leather covered in toupees.

ONLY $5 per roll $55 per dozen. A steal...kind of like what happened to the elections... Delivered right to your store.